Judging vs Teaching

Ive been pondering something for about 3 weeks.
A while back I expressed my opinion on an issue and had the age old "don't judge" thing flung at me. So I started researching a little. First, an opinion is not judging. If I said that fence is white I'm not judging the fence I'm merely stating a fact about the fence. My not saying the fence is white doesn't change the fact that its white.
When something is wrong... its wrong and simply because no one says anything does not make it right. Nor does it make it somehow another persons fault because its wrong and they say something. We as a society just keep blurring that line between right and wrong so much to the point its no longer a line its more of a shadowy area.
For instance or example (which every floats your boat), When raising a child and the child does something wrong you are faced with an opportunity to either teach the child or stunt. If you yell scream and belittle the child you have done damage. If you ignore it you have done damage. But pointing out to the child they have done wrong is not doing that child wrong (judging). There are times when said child isn't mature enough to understand why its wrong and to explain would be useless, because if the child was mature enough to understand the reason something is wrong.. you wouldn't have to explain it.

How can a person learn and grow if there is no "right and wrong". If its a free for all how do children grow into responsible adults? If you take a child around the age of 18 months, just toddling good and never correct him, never teach the child the meaning of no, just allow the child to do whatever by the time that child is 4 you have a little monster on your hands. He has never learned to respect what isn't his and yes this is something needs to be taught. So are you doing the child an injustice by never saying, look you cant play with this... no explanation needed.. you just cannot play with this. Knowing full well when the child gets older he will understand i couldn't play with the electrical plugs. Not because the plugs were bad, but because I could get hurt by not knowing how to handle them.

Are we doing the same thing in spiritual issues? Are we teaching "babes in Christ" there are rights and wrongs? Without belittling, condemnation, gossip..etc. Are we teaching young Christians the right path to walk? While i don't agree with holding a persons feet over hell for every move they make, similar to yelling at child, do we not have some sort of responsibility to teach them or show them a better path so to speak?
If we know about "potholes" in this walk do we not have the responsibility as fellow Christians to show, in love, that person how to avoid them?
In our Ladies Bible study Weds night, btw if you aren't attending you are missing a blessing, We explored the question "Are you fearful of offending someone by offering to help?"  The answer is yes, sometimes you will offend someone by offering help. The example was giving of someone opening a door for someone physically challenged. And the man was offended. Does this mean you should stop offering to help? The answer i cam up with is NO NO NO. The offended part is on the man that was offended. Something in his past he is hanging on to... some hurt or condemnation. Does his offense mean the person opening the door did anything wrong? NO it does not. There are people in this life that have a huge sign on their shoulder "Here is my chip .. i dare you to knock it off". and all to often we allow those folks to dictate how we should treat others. Now had this been another person they would have gladly accepted the gesture of kindness.

I said all that to say this. If we are walking in this life not saying anything or do anything for fear we will offend someone.... that in itself is offending someone. A child does not like being corrected or taught, does that mean we do not? Heavens no. I will bring this closer to home. 90% of the time I am not meaning to be offensive in the things i say.. but i will own the other 10% of the time, but if I was allowed to just keep on with no one telling me different, have you shown me love? Think about it. I'm just using me as an example, but is Love ignoring it until i leave the room and then talking about it? Are we not to help each other in Love grow to be better people. Should we all not be like fine sandpaper to one another... not 80grit.. but maybe 320grit. A true friend is one that is honest.. for without that you have nothing.

Anywho... that's my thoughts on the matter... and NO my thoughts do not mean I'm judging anyone.... for if you look up the word that would give me power... and Lord knows we do NOT want Deb to have that kind of power.